The Hawaiian Motel


I was staying at
the Surfer’s Paradise
Hawaiian Motel
a Wild Turkey in hand
slowly defrosting
in a cyclonic swell
when the news broke
… the King of Rock
had just fatally fell
He could rhythm & blues
the whole jail house block
from a cell
at the Heartbreak Hotel
And then
in his blue suade shoes
gospel all the way
to the edge of reality
Heaven’s pearly gates
now blown straight to hell

Mosquitoes and neon buzzing
as the No Vacancy sign
flickers on
at the Surfer’s Paradise
Hawaiian motel

In the rage
of a new age
the world got fed up
with Doris Day
on a Candy Mountain high
and the Brylcreem Adonis
eating Miss American Pie

Next up
the King of Pop
Then it was
all boys
all singing
all dancing
upon purgatory’s rooftop
“Please make it stop!”
All this lip syncing
The Head Lice
now producing
painted wagons
with ponies prancing
and lights flashing
The television reality
of instant celebrity
following the money
Always flowing
in one direction
The Keepers of the Deep
their ears assaulted
like salt water desalination
Even the shallows insulted
Yet the minnows keep on
singing … and dancing
The discordant
and the harmonic
The angelic and the demonic
What’s the destination?

Somewhere between
heaven and hell
One last throw of the dice
after abiding too long
at the Surfer’s Paradise
Hawaiian Motel
Dwelling on the surface
with the Kings and Queens
of clay … Apotheosis
Living the same old lie
“You too can be
Gods and Goddesses!”

Lost children
of the Cosmiic Ocean
Judas Priest will now
hear your confession
Spiritosis – now in session
with all the morality
of an Caribbean hurricane
carving a dark path
through the fabric
of a torn reality
Adonis now given
a life lesson in humility
by the ungrateful dead
and the forever dying
As Diaphanous
begins her seance
the usual suspects
all in attendance
The gutters open
and overflowing
The seductive utterance
within a tropical storm
dared to be spoken
to Adonis from Venus;
“Just for you,
I’ll be waiting.
Only for you
in the deepest ocean
Adonis, my dearest.”

Man not fallen
far from the apple
when booking into a room
at the Surfer’s Paradise
Hawaiian Motel
Searching for Venus
from Copacabana to Nirvana
Drinking the Kava
and chewing that Betel Nut
from Graceland
to Brian Jonestown
Hoping for just a glimpse
of fair Artemis
ever since
the Garden of Eden
His Kingdom undone
because there
is no known cure
for that Elvis Virus

So Adonis
on a tattered wing
without a prayer
and no satisfaction
took to the aquatic
like a duck
takes to acid
Darkness in white light
Diving the bright
and the exotic
Finding Venus
paragliding with Artemis
and all the hip cats
of the restless seas
being chased
by a hound dog disease
and playing all sorts
of water sports
with bad company
Continuously transmitting
that Blue Suede Virus
Adonis, skin salted
and a stone washed Venus
with hepatitis
seeking a life boat
that will float
whilst ocean cruising
a Rock’n’Roll head wind
Then coming to grief
on a tropical reef
Lou Reed?
Yes indeed
David Bowie too?
Adonis, he should worry
Diaphanous and
the True Emperors
of slow living
Riding that King Tide swell
to deep wells outpouring
Emaciated and dilated
by the waters of Babylon
chasing that toxic thrill
like the shrill
of a false alarm
With Diaphanous whispering
gently to Adonis washed up
but still breathing
With a smile enquiring
“I meant you no harm.
Have you not had your fill?”

Of the Surfer’s Paradise
Hawaiian Motel
… now torn down
The high-rise Concrete Coast
no longer golden
Yet, it seems I’ve been
stuck with the bill
For Venus, she’s long gone
But the music lives on
Adonis has since
had some operation
with Artemis
as his surgeon
Like the siamese twin
of seperation
grieving for idols fallen
from the surplus of vice
at the Hawaiian Motel
with that alarm still ringing
And as for Diaphanous
who can tell? As always
she is transparently missing
Missing the bedbugs
and all those parasites
at that God forsaken
Surfer’s Paradise Hawaiian Motel

~ by David B. Redpath © 2018


Artwork: ‘The Birth of Venus’
~ by Sandro Botticelli

David B. Redpath © 2018

52 thoughts on “The Hawaiian Motel”

  1. Excellent poem.

    I love the way you mixed classical mythological tales of the Venus and Adonis legends with allusions to the deaths of various icons of contemporary culture particularly Elvis Presley and his songs.

    Sort of a 21st Century version of Percy Shelley’s elegy on John Keats’ death- Adonais.

    Liked by 8 people

    1. Thank you muchly, Chris.
      Yes, ‘Sid and Nancy’ is my
      favourite Gary Oldman movie.
      From James Dean, to Amy Winehouse, that celebrity curse crashes head on with
      the Oak Tree of instant reality.


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